A Healing Journey

So this time I was finally going to get round to talking about Dolls Houses as planned - can you tell I'm a bit obsessed? However it appears that healing is the topic of conversation for today. As most of you that are in any way connected to me on Facebook or Instagram will be aware, I've been in hospital. I wasn't going to talk about it, I get fed up with it, so I guess everyone else does too, and let's face it, other people's illnesses aren't exactly riveting stuff! 

However, when I was lying there wide awake in the wee small hours this morning, Trucker and a cat snoring gently, gratefully snug and comfy back in my own bed, I reminded myself that when I started writing my blog I promised myself and Goddess to always speak my truth, even about my darker moments and I knew this would be about my experiences and healing journey instead. 

To cut a long story, short just before Christmas I was taken ill and they found a small tumour obstructing my colon, damn it! As it was preventing my colon from working properly, ie at all, I needed to have an emergency operation to have a stoma or colostomy bag fitted to by-pass it, promptly named Nellie by my lovely friend Neene as it goes Trump, Trump, Trump! As a child I was a bit obsessed with spontaneous human combustion and used to pray that wouldn't happen to me, who knew my colon would take it as a personal challenge to improve on that concept and threaten to blow me up from the inside.... You have to laugh, if you don't you cry and damn that lines your face! 

Anyway this week, I was back in hospital - planned this time, having the tumour removed along with a lymph node which has now been sent off for a biopsy to make sure that it isn't the dreaded big C . Tests from before Christmas didn't indicate cancer, so we are half way there! Either way, the problem has been removed and I now have a tender belly the colour (and shape) of an over ripe Comice pear that looks as though Freddy Kruger has been let loose and used it as a pin cushion. I'm joking, the Surgeon and Nursing team were absolutely amazing, my care was second to none and they did an amazing job and my tiny little scars will all heal away to next to nothing before long. I hadn't wanted to write a drama filled blog about poor me and this isn't that, but it does just explain my self care posts over the last week and if you look back at my blogs you can see when I'm hermiting, when I've been working through grief or whenever I've been full of teenage truculent maiden mardiness but anyway I am well and actually as per usual the goddess had a plan for me, this time to talk about my healing journey and it was cathartic and healing for me mentally just  to have written that down and have you all witness my experience! So thank you.

Kitty Crown Chakra Cleansing!

So when I came to at 1.30am this morning,  and lay wide awake for hours, the sandcastles of my dreams being slowly eroded by the tides of consciousness - lots of wonderful and beautifully articulate ways of describing what's been happening to me were going through my head, I even emailed them to myself but they don't make so much sense now perhaps it was the morphine!  I've had some fantastic dreams; my son wearing a tree outfit, myself and my best friend Lu dancing about being green waves amongst blue ones, as well as rhinos running through mushrooms and being married to the wrong husband - don't even go there ! Lola stretched herself awake and kept me company, gently padding my hair, massaging me better until I went back to sleep several hours later....

After listening to Anita last week I took notice of what my body was doing at 1:30 this morning, gurgling, making a racket and very wide awake and it was my small intestine doing it's thing, letting me know it was healing and getting back to work - did you know that when you have a general anaesthetic your digestive system stops? Stands to reason I guess.  

Hedgie's Healing Spell

I'm blessed to be surrounded by lots of people who believe in healing and sending healing and I can honestly say that lying in my hospital bed, I felt so much of it coming my way, literally felt it, felt the fizzing power of Hedgie's healing spell energy. Those of you who saw my Talking with My Goddess with lovely Kayleigh in December might remember me talking about a blue light and energy that was around me last time I was in, which she said she thought was probably the Archangel Raphael? I had exactly the same thing happened to me again this time - longer and more prolonged. A dreamy blue aura all around me that came and went. I was well aware of patches of heat rolling over me, there are times when the  very air around me seemed to shimmer and time would momentarily stand still too! Now it could have been the morphine, fabulous stuff, but I genuinely think it was more than that. I know I was sent Reiki and healing by many wonderful friends, prayers were whispered on my behalf, spells were created and woven. I felt so held in love. Even the doctors, the surgeon and the nurses were impressed with how quickly I was up and walking around, looking like I hadn't had an operation without copious amounts of pain killers. One of the lovely, lovely nurses even commented on the vibe in my room, she said it was full of positivity and joy. Naturally! I was being held by so many amazing souls.

Love and Magic from my favourite 11 year old and her Nan...

Of course it wasn't just this meta-physical, ethereal healing that has supported and nourished me, so many texts, messages, cards, letters, phone and zoom calls came my way too, just knowing people are thinking of you is an amazing energy to heal in, especially when Covid means no visitors at all.  

There was also the absolute bliss of being transported to my parents house for Claire-sitting whilst the Trucker was at work, my childhood home where four generations of my family have shared life, love, laughter and supported each other through everything that has come our way since 1967, being sent to my childhood bedroom for an afternoon nap and tucked in by my 70 something Mum again! A get well message from a childhood friend that included a video of me at her birthday party in 1977 that she had transferred to video from Cine 8 for her Dad, culminating in us both agreeing that our homemade 70's party dresses suggested our Mums did way more drugs than they ever let on... 

Cheers Nessa!! Can you spot me? 

Have a look at 22 - 25 seconds as I elegantly lope round the chairs .... 

This treat was followed by side and almost stitch splitting laughter with my Mum being Mrs Malaprop asking me if I wanted a slice of Fright Coke with my cuppa, fruit cake Mother, fruit cake! Before finally coming home to Unicorn letters and a hand made card from my best friend's granddaughter Brooke - my unofficial great niece, who thought I was Great Aunty because I was great as in amazing bless her heart, who's birthday wish was for me to be better - what magical wonder is that?! Cat cuddles and a crazy hour long  faced paced WhatsApp conversation with my friends from school this morning that would make your hair curl. Literally! So much healing on so very many levels, in so many shapes and forms.


Laughter, probably the best medicine there is. So here's my journey of healing so far, there's some way to go, another operation will be needed in a couple of months time to reconnect the pipe work so to speak but I'm going to make the most of the time off, put my feet up and heal. I'd say rest and do nothing but that's a step too far, instead that I thought I'd do a short course connected to work, which I can keep my brain occupied with during my month's necessary convalescence (which will be policed by Trucker and my parents!) The significance of what I had signed up for didn't occur to me until I started writing this... an Ancestral Healing Course, wouldn't be anything else would it? 

Thank You for sharing My Journey with me..

Have A Blessed Week x x 


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